THE FRENZ EXPERIMENT

Frenz - Carry Bag Man - Get A Hotel - Victoria - Athlete Cured - In These Times - The Steak Place - Bremen Nacht - Guest Informant (Excerpt) - Oswald Defense Lawyer - Tuff Life Boogie - Guest Informant - Twister - There's A Ghost In My House - Hit The North


FRENZ [top of page]

My friends
Gonna tell you about my friends:
My friends ain't enough for one hand,
My friends ain't enough for one hand,
My friends don't amount to one hand,
One hand.

My friends don't add up to one hand,
My friends don't amount to one hand,
One hand.
Tell ya 'bout my friends. (Why do you count them?)

My friends don't count up to one hand,
My friends cannot count on one hand.
My friends don't amount to one hand.

Tell ya 'bout my friends.
My friends don't add up to one hand,
My friends don't count up to hand.
Tell ya 'bout my friends.
My friends don't amount to one hand,
My friends don't count up to one hand,
One hand.
Tell ya 'bout my friends.

(Do you count them?)

(How many are there?)


CARRY BAG MAN [top of page]

I'm in love with the Carrier Bag Man
I love the Carrier Bag Man X2
Carrier bags strewn all around the room
Ah, the Carrier Bag Man-- I am him
Coz I am the Carrier Bag Man -- I am the carrier bag man

I've no time to sit comfortable down
But I still need armchairs round my home
To put carrier bags on

I am the Carrier Bag Man
Carry a bag man!

I don't make waves, I hide bags in graves
No cash is earned straight nowadays anyways
Please all you onlookers understand
So make gangway for Carrier Bag Man

I am Carrier Bag Man

[megaphone rant]

When in town I keep head down
Kneel on the croft when the mariah comes round
Fat-assed workmen, I scurry around
There's few good places to hide bags behind

Coz I am Carrier Bag Man.
Carry a bag man!


GET A HOTEL [top of page]

Get a hotel today.
Go get a hotel today.
Go get a hotel today.
Before the idea slips away,
Get a hotel.
Go get a hotel today.
That was the first question raised,
There was a question raised.
Get a hotel
Wanna get in (x2)
But this is not the place to bring it up
Go get a hotel today(x2)
Before the bike siren calls
Times running
Like butter dissolving
Times running, time dissolving,
Times running melting
Times running passing
Its running passing.
Get a hotel today (x2)
She says get a hotel
Ne'er do well
Get a hotel (x2)
Before the bike siren calls
And the horn siren yells
It says
Get a hotel (x2)
You better
Go get a hotel today (x2)
Times running
Times running passing
Times running,
Times running,
It's running it's passing
Like butter melting
Times running, passing, it's running passing
Like flesh cut melting
It's running it's passing times running it's passing dissolving,
I was eating gravel when two cars put in. (x2)
Headlights dousing,
Broken warehouse;
I just got out
Dirt inhaled
The cinders told me,
Ya shoulda got a hotel.
Go get a hotel today. x2
Before the bike siren calls.
And the blood-curdlers yell.
Go get a hotel today.
All thugs use the Burton ploy;
The Lord acts
Around my appeal.
He says get a hotel.
Shoulda!
Go get a hotel today.
Get a hotel.
A little voice yells
should of got a hotel.
Get a hotel.
Go a hotel today.
Get a hotel,
Get a hotel.


VICTORIA [top of page]

It was bad, called obscene
And the rich were so mean
Stately homes for the Lords
Golden lawns, village green
Victoria was my queen

Victoria, Victoria, Victoria

I was born, lucky me
In the land that I love
Though I'm poor, I am free
When I go I shall fight
For this land I willl die
Let her sun never set on

Victoria, Victoria, Victoria

Canada to India
Australia to Cornwall
Singapore to Hong Kong
From the West to the East
From the rich to the poor
Victoria loved them all

Victoria, Victoria, Victoria


ATHLETE CURED [top of page]

Look under
Look under

From the hotbed of creation
in dreamstate.
The cure, bulletin, zeitung
Was in no pill.
Look under.
The cure was in no pill.

The German athletic star was continually ill.
For months doctors were puzzled.
The star would complain of the smell in his room.
On visiting him this was found to be true.
An odor resembling hot-dogs permeated the whole bedroom.

A solution was only discovered by my closely
watching his brother Gert.
Gert was handsome, well-meaning,  but slightly a careless type.
Not malicious, I hope you understand and grasp.
No chance.

But on returning from his clerical job, Gert
would park his Volkswagen at the end of the day
willy-nilly in the driveway, usually the wrong way round,
so that the exhaust fumes would flow upwards right through
the open windows of the athletic star's upstairs bedroom.
(carburettor)

I also discovered that Gert would turn his engine
over for up to an hour. I don't know why.
Citizens in my street are also
partial to this.

Look under.
The cure was in no pill.

Obtaining a new parking space for Gert's motor-car, athletic star soon
recovered.
Unfortunately, this being East Germany,
Gert patriotically volunteered to be sent on a labor
beautification course of the countryside north-west of Dresden.
And never seen again.
And never seen again.

Look under.
The cure was in no pill.
Had to look under the window sill.
The window sill.

Look under.
The cure was in no pill.
Had to look under the window sill.
The window sill.

From certain facts you have to go on and further
and often it is better to go around or look under.
the windowsill

etc..
etc..


IN THESE TIMES [top of page]

A flat season - vision gone
Picture frame it, and say so long;
My Aqua-cat is where it's at and new to mammal range
Buy you know it would never suit, territories Alpine

In These TIMES - Meeowww
In These Times - Fishcat Mother
In This Time - Spectral Filter
In These Times - A Feline Nutter

In these times;

A Man down South, he did go out and he did kill fifteen
What the papers could not grasp or work out, was his life
in a Flea brain;

In These Times - Universal Tepid
In These Times - Stagnant Mind
In This Time - And in these times
These Times - They're both the same

Diluted Jesuits pour out of mutual walkmans
From Elland Road to Venice Pensions and down
the Autobahns;

In This Time - If That's it I'm leaving
In These Times - Leave this planet fast
In These Times - It affects my sleeping
In This Time - My dreams are one to miss
Ones to be avoiding
In times like this

I often hope in days ahead my gossamer front gates,
will keep out the trash in which my psychic streets' emershed;

In These Times - Spectral Filter
In These Times - In Your Midst
In These Times - This song's a belter
In This Time - For times like this

In These Times - I picture framed pre-teen rap gangs,
with alsatians, Scapa flow steel became
inexpensive

A first season - vision gone
Picture frame it - and say so long
They say 'Give up Buster' - Cram it down
But I grow stronger, and break their Midszzzzzzzz


THE STEAK PLACE [top of page]

Head down
Head down
Head, head, head down.

Fool of the Commonwealth drove down there,
Down turnpike;
Desperate for food desperate for respite.

The steak place.
The steak place

Cheap carpet lines the way
Aluminium tack door handles
Candelabra lions head
Via butchers display too.

The steak place (x2)

Via a carcass row
Things are brought forward and eaten,
I see the corners filled with hitmen,
Two young lawyers they are whispering, in

The steak place (x2)

I wanna stay here,
I don't wanna go anywhere,
I could remain here,

Head down
Head down
Head down
Head, head, head down
The steak place (x2)

I'd stop the automation,
I'd sit behind dusty lace,
I have a word with hitmen,
I give off a beatific face.

The steak place (x2)
From New York City run screaming,
Into New England states,
Combined a man not should have to do this,
A man should not use his fist in

The steak place.
The steak place.

I wanna stay here,
I don't wanna go anywhere,
I shall remain here.

(Bad song)


BREMEN NACHT [top of page]

Something happened in Bremen, I know
Something I don't want to
Something under the ceiling muttered
Something in its steel shutters

Underlining my usual timing
Aligning casual set-list
And it aligned?
Knowing where right room is
I was more than usual pissed

Was first ashamed at bruise on wrist
Was then annoyed at skin-patch on back
Then I did myself acquit
On Bremen Nacht

Ich leave real quick das Bremen Nacht

Ich rausum mach aus bremen nacht

Ich rausum mach das bremen nacht

Ic-raus-Mach-Schnell aus das bremen nicht

Ich-aus Schnell mach sas bremen nacht

Ich Mach Schnell pack und aus das bremen nacht

Ich raus schnell mach von bremen nacht [1]

The child's four-fingered bruises on my hip
Meant I had been one day possessed

Right through Bremen Nacht
Right on to Bremen Tag
The sunlit Bremen day
By Tonsillitis size train station Hof
Could only in one way fail to impress
This on drinks door I did lay
I had been one day possessed

Ich rausum mach aus bremen nacht

Thank God skin-patch is nearly gone
And the impress of fingers dead
Have disappeared and left me alone

That's one night I didna put jackboots on
Don't want to end reflection
It's still there, though I am gone

And it will be a long long long time gone
before my spirit will in accident
go back and come from Bremen Nacht
go back and come from Bremen Nacht

Note: [1] These phrases are corrupted German for approximately "I must quickly leave the Night of Bremen!"


GUEST INFORMANT (EXCERPT) [top of page]

[see below]


OSWALD DEFENSE LAWYER [top of page]

How could he cope with the flashing-by past [/flash in my past]?
Through my vid-earphone amp I had to tap
I relate the tract
Oswald Defense Lawyer

Oswald Defense Lawyer
Embraces the scruffed corpse [1] of the Mark Twain
Oswald Defense Lawyer

How do you think that jury made up of putrid mass
Embraced theory of triangle bullet lines
Turning in circles twice,
Then incredible, marvelous, exiting back of mind?
And Oswald's Defense Lawyer
Embraces scruffed corpse of Mark Twain
Oswald Defense Lawyer
Embraces scruffed corpse of Walt Whitman
Oswald Defense Lawyer
Embraces the scruffed corpse of Mark Twain

Decent lawyer fishes in buckskin hat
Raccoons drown beneath his embarking mass
When he sees CIA shit flying over head fast
Goody goody looks up
In cloudless sky enhancing theory of zig-zag bulletline
Oswald Defense Lawyer
Embraces the scruffed corpse of the Mark Twain

He's liberal and insane,
He caught the good news horse
His opposite is vain
The cardboard fake in the witness stand
He's got an interview in Spin magazine
He loves the magazine
His mouth is in his brain
The prosecution lawyer
Turns himself to butter
Oswald Defense Lawyer

Oswald Defense Lawyer
Embraces the scruffed corpse of Walt Whitman
Cheap rifle photo touched up
Drawn on sky
Oswald's head added on a commie tie
While Oswald Defense Lawyer
Embraces the scuffed corpse of Mark Twain

Note: [1] In an interview in New Musical Express, Mark E Smith said this was "stuffed corpse" but it's not that on the album


TUFF LIFE BOOGIE [top of page]

You let me down again
And then your goth, slag brain says
Tuff life yeah baby! X8

All you ever say
Is round revival boogie
It's a revival boogie
It's a
It's a small flat baby
Tuff life yeah baby!
Tuff life yeah baby!
All you ever need
Tuff life yeah baby! X4
With the balding man
You went to the Netherlands
And with a pernicious refrain
You return and say the same
Give it to me baby one more time X5
You forever say
Tuff life yeah baby!
Tuff life yeah baby!


GUEST INFORMANT [top of page]

Baghdad/Space Cog/Analyst [1]
You'll never guess who informed
It was Craig and Steve
The stool pigeons, cha-cha-cha-cha...

Guest informant, guest informant
Guest informant, guest informant
I followed the colonel to the cheap hotel,
I tapped the beds
I wired the phones as well,
Colonel Boggs Maroley was his mantle
Had not counted on
I had not counted on
Guest Informant, guest informant

I've been split on, I've been touted on,
I had not counted on Guest Informant


In the burning scorch of another Sunday over
The miserable Scottish hotel,
Resembled a Genesis or Marillion, 1973 LP cover
All the hotel staff had been dismissed,
It was me, the Hoover, and the O. A. P.s
Asked: Could he turn killer?
Thought: could I kill him?
Pondered: Or is he itinerant?
But I guess he's just a cog analyst
Guest informant, guest informant

Baghdad/Space Cog/Analyst.

I could not comprehend, I could not understand
Had not counted on, I had not counted all
Guest informant, guest informant
I've been split by a first-grade moron
And I had not counted on, I had not counted on
Guest informant, guest informant
Guest informant, guest informant
I've been let down, by a first-grade moron
And I could not comprehend
Had not counted on
Guest informant, guest informant

Note: [1] This line is a topic of much contention. Sean Russell advised on 14 February 1996: "I wrote to Cog Sinister with a pile of questions, one of them being what the hell Brix was saying [in "Guest Informant"]. Lucy [Rimmer] wrote back and said she asked Brix, who said the phrase was "Baghdad/Space Cog/Analyst"


TWISTER [top of page]

The magnificent structure straddled the river
As I dictated my autobiography to my biographer
When I heard this tune
My title was "Renegade Genius"
But was interrupted much too soon
Was interrupted much too soon
I received this line

Twister

From me in Hampstead he received a letter
I headed it "Dear Twister"
Up from West Hampstead I visited Keswick
On permission from the guard
I begun like this but could not continue it
When I heard this tune
(It begun like this but could not continue it)
My ears were burned
By this tune
My head swooned
By this tune

Twister

The train from London on day of lunacy
Was packed with innocents
Children tended by walkman'd parents
Cretins auditioning
For non-existent parts on TV One
The train was a tube
Within the crushing beauty of the countryside
On the London-Keswick run

Twister

([MES in background:
My head burned...burned...da da da da..my ears burned..
countryside has sold out..countryside...cheap phone calls home...
accent all around..cheap phone calls...ramble..grinning...
normally..rambled...in my ear hole...was day of lunacy..some things
like...explosives..of pages turned..shadows..massive fucking noises...pop stars.. heh heh hackles...try mystic meg..twister...rustic town...
twister)

Twister


THERE'S A GHOST IN MY HOUSE [top of page]

There's a ghost in my house
The ghost of your memory
The ghost of the love that was took from me

Our love used to be
Only shadows in the past I see
Times can't seem to've erased
The vision of your smiling face

Dead flowers I sent thee
I can't get over ye

There's a ghost in my house
I can't hide (ghost in my house)
For the ghost of your love is inside (ghost in my house)
Keeps on haunting me (ghost in my house)
Just keeps on becalling me (ghost in my house)

Down in my tea cup [1]
I see your face looking up
Sitting in my easy chair
I feel your fingers running through my hair

Though we're far apart
Your spectre's in my heart

There's a ghost in my house
I can't hide (ghost in my house)
For the ghost of your love is inside (ghost in my house)
Keeps on haunting me (ghost in my house)
Still just a part of me (ghost in my house)

By the way I hang my head
You can see I'm afraid
Thought my heart knows you're gone
My mind keeps rolling on

There's a ghost in my house
I can't hide

In my house I am helpless
[?] practice superstitious

I hear footsteps on the stairs
I know there's no-one there
Keeps on haunting me
Keeps on haunting me

There's a ghost in my house
A ghost of your memory
A ghost of the love that was took from me

Ghost in my house (to fade)

Note: [1] According to the book Paintwork: "Smith wrapped his entire body around the line 'there's a spectre in my heart' and somehow managed to anglicize the entire song by substituting 'tea' for 'coffee' so that the tortured lover now instead of looking down in his coffee cup, looked down in his tea cup. Subtle but effective."


HIT THE NORTH [top of page]

Hit the North
My Cat says eeeee-ack
Hit the North
95% of [hayseeds or corn-pone], guaranteed
Computers infest the hotels
Cops can't catch criminals
But what the heck, they're not too bad, they talk to God

Religioussssss
Hit the North
Manacled to the city, manacled to the city
All estate agents alive yell down nights in hysterical breath
Those Northern lights... so pretty
Those big big big wide streets
Those useless MPs
Savages...
Hit the North (Manacled to the system)

From the back third eye psyche, the reflected mirror of delirium,
Eastender and Victoria's lager, the induced call, mysterious,
comes
forth - Hit the North
(Savages)
Hit the North


NOTES [top of page]

The songs above are from the CD tracklisting, which comprised the original vinyl album plus A & B sides from singles issued around the time of the album.